VNA Answer Nurse: Coping with Loss During the Holidays

Paula Thibideau is a Licensed Practical Nurse with the Visiting Nurse Association (VNA) and coordinates all aspects of community wellness for the non-profit home healthcare agency.

Q: This is my first holiday alone, is it reasonable to want to do something different?
A: Reflecting on your needs is important. Holidays or not, engaging in new activities, meeting new people and making time for new experiences can be fulfilling. Whether you travel, find a place to volunteer or take an interest in a new hobby, finding a healthy outlet when you’re experiencing grief can help you process your feelings and help you heal.

Q: Everyone expects to come home for the holidays and it’s overwhelming, what do I do?
A: You can do as little or as much as you want. Just be honest with family and friends. Acknowledge that the holidays will be different and that they will be difficult. Let people what you can and can’t do. Ask another family member to host this year. Give yourself gifts: patience and boundaries.

Q: Is a stress-free holiday possible?
A: Get through the holiday by doing what you need to do for you. You are not required to send out the usual card list or fulfill the usual gift exchanges. There are traditions Just be honest with family and friends. Acknowledge that the holidays will be different and that they will be difficult. Let people what you can and can’t do. Ask another family member to host this year. Give yourself gifts: patience and boundaries.

Q: Is a stress-free holiday possible?
A: Get through the holiday by doing what you need to do for you. You are not required to send out the usual card list or fulfill the usual gift exchanges. There are traditions you may want to keep, change or forego. Get through the holidays focused on taking care of you.

Q: How do I excuse myself social activities?
A: You are not obligated to make plans nor attend events. If a Christmas party or dinner sounds “doable”, ask a trusted friend to drive so can you leave at any time. If you change your mind, be patient with yourself. Just go home. You are navigating a new normal and it’s okay to make it a short visit. Remember, you have choices. You can decide what’s important to you.

Q: Where can I go to talk to someone who understands?
A: Grief support groups are a good way to connect with individuals who have shared and experienced loss. If you are not up for a group setting, seek a therapist or counselor who specializes in grief and bereavement.

This information is for educational purposes. Please consult your physician for any medical issues. The Visiting Nurse Association (VNA) is committed to bringing trusted and quality private and home health care to Brevard County patients from Titusville to Barefoot Bay. For more information about VNA services, call 321-752-7550 or visit www.vnatc.com.